| Rant [1009] "Stomping Grounds" |
[Nov. 16th, 2009|05:50 am] |
|
http://megatokyo.com/rant/1009 I'd heard "You can never go home". Before this weekend, I'd never taken it seriously.I should explain a little. About a year and a half ago, I graduated from the University of Michigan and left behind Ann Arbor, my home of five years. I got a job in Plymouth (a Detroit suburb), and lived there until May of this year.Now I live in Kansas City, but that's beside the point. Westport area, for the truly curious.When I was in Plymouth, the town never se...[permalink] |
|
|
| yes. going. |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|10:21 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
After an experience this weekend with half a bottle of rum, I am definitely going to this meeting.
Hello, I'm In Denial. How are you? Pleased to meet you, Self Actualisation!
Curious, though... There seems to be a lot of AA hate out there. I mean, serious hate.
What's the deal with that? |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|07:03 pm] |
I mean, the opening of the condensed milk can _doesn't_ look rusty. But it makes me worry. But! I did just have a fun tetnus shot 11 months ago Ok, clearly this is a new habit I've taken to. I like it, it's easy, I get a treat at home, etc, etc So maybe I should figure out a better way to deal with the condensed milk, plastic squirty bottle maybe. Now to figure out how to get the whole lid off of one of these tiny cans (why so small!?!) Hey, I do know where the bandaids are ... Posted via LiveJournal.app. |
|
|
| Posted using TxtLJ |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|04:24 pm] |
|
I just found a last bee of the year on our car. Wondfr what bees represent as totems or guides. |
|
|
| Lucy is coming along nicely |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|07:35 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  pleased | ] |
Not only is Lucy coming into the house all on her own, and not flinching so much, but she now is interacting with us, playing and demanding attention.
Both Lucy and Simba are improving in appearance and health. Still eating a lot more then normal, but it's slowed considerably compared to what they were doing when they first realised food was available. From 5 or more feeds a day to 2 or 3.
And for a special treat, an animated gif of Aikidomayland playing 'catch' with Lucy.
( Meow! ) |
|
|
| No longer grateful. |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|10:57 am] |
I'm about a fortnight away from having 23 sober months. I had initially felt such gratitude to escape drinking and everything that went along with it - always feeling like shit about myself, never having any money for anything other than booze, the impossibly low self esteem that went along with non stop destructive behaviour. At first, I struggled with AA. I was very uncomfortable admitting that I was 'powerless' relating to any aspect of my life, and took staying sober to be my responsibility. I took ownership of my drinking, and didn't give anything to my HP which I didn't know I believed in and certainly wasn't in a fit state to examine my personal theology. I was barely conscious most of the time!
Recently I've stopped feeling that same urgency I had in the beginning. I feel like I don't care if I stay sober or not because I feel like I'm the only one that gives a shit either way. I bet no one would even know, I had my drinking down to such a fine art, I was highly functional, I bet I could get away with it... I know these are negative thoughts... but I'm not sure I care any more. I had such a difficult day yesterday, I felt so angry about nothing really. Nothing I could really pin down as a solid reason. I guess that's just how we as alcoholics react sometimes. I was alone for much of the day and obsessing; you guys know what I mean, really jonesing for that buzz. I didn't drink but where I would normally feel relief that I dodged a bullet, and gratitude for another sober day, I feel nothing. So what? Now I want to drink again, so what's the point?
Can anyone empathise? |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|09:02 am] |
Quick post. Down in Stevenage just now. came across from London to see a friend so am abusing computer usage a bit:p
Will update more when I get back, having fun in London anyway, though not been sleeping too well and been exhausted walking round. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Nov. 14th, 2009|11:00 pm] |
Fever Ray - Keep the Streets Empty for Me.
Lyrics:
Memory comes when memory's old
I am never the first to know
Following the stream up North
Where do people like us float
There is room in my lap
For bruises, asses, handclaps
I will never disappear
For forever, I'll be here
Whispering
Morning, keep the streets empty for me
Morning, keep the streets empty for me
I'm laying down, eating snow
My fur is hot, my tongue is cold
On a bed of spider web
I think of how to change myself
A lot of hope in a one man tent
There's no room for innocence
Take me home before the storm
Velvet mites will keep us warm
Whispering
Morning, keep the streets empty for me
Uncover our heads and reveal our souls
We were hungry before we were born |
|
|
| Jasper & Evy play! |
[Nov. 15th, 2009|12:14 am] |
I finally was able to get video of Jasper and Evy playing! They are so cute. But I do have a question. In the video you will hear Jasper 'crying' and hissing at Evy as they play. He always does this. But he comes back to play with her and doesn't hide...so...is he really disliking how Evy is playing, trying to tell her to stop but she is too much a kitten to understand or is Jasper just a wimp and being vocal about it? Thanks and enjoy!
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
thomaskattus's Friends Page
Deutsch